The Ties That Bind Us
by justawakingdream
Summary: The story of two Hogwarts students on the extreme ends of the spectrum and the effect they have on the world around them and each other. What starts off as a simple moment of attraction can often snowball into more than anybody bargained for.
1. No Rivers and Lakes Can Put the Fire Out

**Author's Note: **Everything you recognize belongs to JK Rowling. Everything you don't is either based on her world/creations, a creation of my own, or temporarily borrowed with permission from a friend (like dear Grey, for example).

* * *

By all appearances, this was the closest thing to a Professor-sanctioned party as Hogwarts ever got. Caroline Winters had dressed up, and she'd even shown up _on time _thinking that there might be some fun to be had. And why not? She had everything – the perfect dress, a gorgeous date, and a stash hidden in her room so that by the time she'd arrived she was already well on her way to being tipsy. And why not? She was seventeen, there was no reason she shouldn't.

After her arrival, however, she'd discovered that it was hardly the spectacular event she'd built it up to be in her mind. Was this really the best Hogwarts had to offer? She'd been to quite a few parties in her relatively short lifetime, but she could say with some certainty that the current affair had to be the most _boring_ of them all. She'd heard so many good things about Slughorn's Christmas parties, and she'd believed it. If she hadn't, she wouldn't have shown up at all. This was even worse than her own family's Christmas parties, and those were uncomfortable for her for more reasons than she could count. Lately her parents had taken to parading her around like a prize poodle, trying to interest the son of some rich pureblood friend or another. It was too bad for them, really, that Carrie's reputation preceded her.

She sighed, taking another sip of spiked punch. The only remedy for the depressing feelings brought on by Christmas and the associated parties was to drink more, and she planned on doing exactly that. The Professor wouldn't likely approve, but what did she care? Most of the things she'd done had been things that nobody approved of, but that had never stopped her. She raised her punch glass for another sip, pausing halfway there when something – or rather, someone – caught her eye.

Well, _hello_ there.

Suddenly the fact that Caroline had brought a date meant very little to her. After all, it hardly meant that she couldn't look at other boys, after all. It wasn't as though Walden Macnair was innocent, anyway – he was too busy staring at some other girl to notice what Carrie was up to. She had to wonder, for a moment, what the other girl had that she didn't. She was pretty, certainly, but she was some boring little Hufflepuff who likely wouldn't give Walden the time of day even if he did bother to approach her. Why should she? Walden _wasn't _a nice boy, but that was the reason Caroline liked him. Nice boys were boring, the same as nice girls.

If Walden couldn't manage to keep his eyes in his head for five minutes around a girl who clearly had no interest, then he wasn't worthy of being Carrie's date in the first place. She'd intended to come alone, at first, but he'd asked her and he was attractive, so why not? It wasn't as though they didn't have fun when they were together, just ... not in ways that could be shared in public. He'd promised her a long night full of entertainment, and he had yet to deliver.

At the moment, however, Walden Macnair was forgotten. Caroline's grip on her punch glass tightened ever-so-slightly as she focused on the blond boy, who seemed content to chat with his own small group of friends. Some of them she knew – Dai, for one. It would have been hard to miss _him_, with his head of outrageously red hair. Carrie was more interested in the blond boy, however – one of the few good things left at Hogwarts that she had yet to sample.

She elbowed the only person near enough to reach, a housemate who would no doubt be irritated by the rough treatment. The action elicited an indignant huff, but Carrie silenced it by gesturing at the boy. She was too interested and a little too tipsy to feign politeness at that point, and it was just as well. There were more pressing matters at hand, like identifying the person in question. **"Who is that, Seph?"**

As though it mattered, honestly. Carrie had already made up her mind that she was going to have the boy, though it didn't hurt to get the lay of the land before charging right on in. Persephone just shook her head and smirked at Carrie, as though amused by some private joke.

**"Don't even bother, Caroline. That boy's practically a monk. That's _Grey Abbott_."**

Practically a monk? That sounded perfectly workable to Carrie. A smirk crept across her face, blue eyes alight with mischief. If Persephone thought that she'd let a little thing like that stop her, then clearly she had yet to prove herself to these people. **"**_**Practically**_** a monk is not the same as **_**actually**_** a monk." **

Persephone just smiled and refilled her punch glass. **"Trust me. That's one even you can't crack. Every girl here has tried."** She sounded almost affronted that Caroline would assume she'd succeed where so many others had failed. And so, Carrie set this as a challenge for herself, giggling into her punch glass. Her eyes wandered over him again, and she came to the conclusion that she must have been blind not to notice him sooner. Where had he been _hiding _since September? She'd made her way through more than half of the school's eligible population by now, and yet she'd somehow missed this boy.

That would most certainly have to be remedied now. The next morning she'd start laying her trap. She'd find out everything there was to know, everything that had failed before, and she'd fine a way to make it work. She'd find a way to make _him_ play _her_ game. She had no doubt that other girls had tried, but she had something that they didn't have.

She was _the _Caroline Winters, and they'd better not forget it.


	2. I Won't Give Up, I Won't Let Go

This was going to be more complicated than Caroline had originally thought. She'd asked around about the boy who'd caught her eye at Slughorn's party, and heard about how he was the model student, how he spent most of his time in the library and rarely tore himself away from his studies to attend parties. He was, by all accounts, as _boring_ as he was attractive. Caroline wasn't certain that she could bring herself to commit to playing the game as long as this would take. Even she knew that he wasn't going to break overnight, after all, and so she'd have to think long and hard about just how much she wanted to make this happen.

In the end, though, she knew it would be worth it. She hadn't singled him out for no reason, after all. She could only imagine that, if he looked so good with his clothes _on_, he'd looked even better with them off. She'd been daydreaming about that for the past twenty-four hours, after all. The party hadn't ended up exactly the way she'd expected – Walden had gone off with the Hufflepuff girl and Carrie had been left to her own devices, but that had been just fine. She'd found Tessy Adler and they'd made their own fun.

In the end, Carrie honestly wasn't sure how the relationship between she and Tessy even worked at all. It _shouldn't_ have worked. They were similar – both fond of their alcohol, and both fond of boys. Tessy didn't have the same drive that Carrie did to be the best, however, and perhaps that was what made it possible for them to be friends. Tessy was willing to step aside when Caroline felt the need to throw her weight around. That was the biggest reason that they _worked_.

After all, Carrie had known girls like Tessy before, and she'd generally hated most of them because they thought they could encroach on her territory. Tessy was bright enough to know better – or perhaps not ambitious enough to try. She couldn't be sure which was true, but either way she was grateful to have somebody she could trust within the school walls.

Right now, that was the only thing keeping her on track. If she hadn't had the other girl to spill her thoughts to, she'd have just given up on the idea of winning Grey over. Tessy, however, was one of the only people Carrie knew who could provide decent advice to others while making a complete mess of her own life. She perched on the edge of a desk in the empty classroom, waiting while the other girl situated herself so they could talk. As soon as Tessy settled in she pulled the customary flask out of a pocket of her jacket, holding it up.

"**I'll let you finish this off if you tell me what's on your mind."**

In the end, Tessy knew Carrie far too well. She'd had had nothing but _one_ thing on her mind since seeing the boy at Slughorn's party, and she wasn't about to deny it. Why should she? He was attractive, she was attractive – there was no reason not to admit it. The only wrinkle in the whole thing was the fact that he seemed stubbornly opposed to that sort of thing.

She could change his mind, though, she knew it.

"**Fine. I'll take you up on that. It's more a ****_who_**** than a what," **Carrie corrected her, brushing blonde hair back out of her face as she shifted her position on the desk slightly. **"Someone who's practically a monk, apparently."**

Tessy just handed over the flask, giggling as she did. **"So you've met Grey Abbott. Trust me, Carrie – girls have been trying for years. You'd have to pull out all the stops to land him."**

In the end, she wasn't providing any information that Caroline hadn't already come to a conclusion about herself. **"I know. But ... something just tells me he'd be worth it, you know?"** She unstoppered the flask and took a long swig of amber liquid, frowning as she pondered the situation. **"I have to try." **She had no idea why she felt compelled to dig in her heels and fight an uphill battle to have this boy, but she _did_. The electric intensity she'd felt in that brief moment their eyes had met had convinced her of that. Tessy, on the other hand, didn't seem to be buying it for a second.

**"He's totally inexperienced. Why would he be worth it?"**

**"You've seen him, Tessy. You've got eyes."**

**"Yeah, but plenty of attractive guys are disappointing in bed."**

**"It's just a feeling I have, Tessy. You weren't there. He looked me in the eyes, and it was just ... intense."**

That seemed to give Tessy a moment's pause, before she spoke again. **"He looked you in the eyes ... Carrie, you aren't going soft on me, are you?"**

It was an accusation that horrified Caroline, to be quite honest. She'd been one of those girls, once upon a time - trusting, naive, willing to fall in love. It had led to nothing but heartbreak in the end, and she wouldn't go down that road again. **"Don't be ridiculous. Of course not."**

**"Your wasting your time, mooning over Grey Abbott."**

**"I'm not _mooning_. I'm not even _pining_. He's pretty and I want him, that's not such a bad thing."**

**"It is when it's him."**

Caroline honestly couldn't understand why it was that Tessy would be so opposed to her pursuit of the boy, unless it so happened that Tessy wanted Grey for herself. **"Why do you hate this idea so much?"**

**"Because. You'll have to take a lot of time to win him over, and you'll end up mooning over him."**

**"I will not. That's completely ridiculous."**

**"Just give up on him, Carrie. Pick somebody else. _Anybody_ else would be easier."**

The wheels started to turn in Caroline's brain at this, wondering just _why _it was that Tessy was so adamant that she choose some other boy. **"You want him for yourself, don't you?"**

Tessy just looked amused. **"I gave up on him when we were fifteen. I tried to kiss him, and he didn't even react. I called him some ... _choice_ names, but he still held my hair back when I got sick."**

**"People keep telling me these stories about him, but that doesn't make me less interested."**

**"I'm just making sure you know what you're getting yourself into. He'll take all your time and effort just to _consider_ it."**

**"He'll be worth it, Tessy. I know he will." **With that, Carrie downed the last of the flask and handed it back to Tessy. **"Thanks for the drink. Sorry to drink and ditch, but I've got a Ravenclaw monk to corrupt." **

**"Whatever you say, Carrie." **Tessy just shook her head and pocketed the flask as the other girl left the room. In the end, there was never any reasoning with Carrie.


	3. A Blessing and a Curse

Caroline could honestly say that she had never put this much time and effort into chasing a boy. Ever since she'd seen him at the party, she'd been contemplating how she was going to get him into bed with her and wondering about him. You didn't see boys who looked like that every day, after all. It might only be once, but she was at least going to fight for that. Being as stubborn as Carrie was was both a blessing and a curse - she could hold her own with the best of them, but she didn't always realize it when it was the right time to back down.

What sort of thing would buy her a little time to work on him? She supposed she could always pretend that she needed help with schoolwork, but that would involve actually spending time in the library. Besides, wasn't that a little too much effort to expend on a boy that she just wanted to sleep with? She'd save that for a last resort. If he turned her down outright, then she'd at least have something to buy her time to work on wearing down his resolve.

Men were men, after all, and they all had urges and desires. It would only take so long to wear him down, even if he was the most stubborn of boys. And then, she'd have him right where she wanted him, and she could get what she wanted and move on. It was as simple as that. The only thing that ever varied was how long it took said boy to break down and give her what she wanted.

In the end, this was just going to be a hit and run.

She'd finally made her way to the library with some difficulty. So, this was what all the commotion was about, was it? She didn't see anything so great about it. It was musty, it smelled like old books, and it was too quiet for her liking. She glanced around for a moment before she caught sight of him. She tried to hide the smirk on her face as she approached, as carefully and quietly as she could.

"**Hey, blondie."** She said in a voice just above a whisper as she approached him. "**I have a problem. You see, I need you to get in my bed. Preferably right now." **She assumed that it was a statement that he would readily agree to, because really … who wouldn't? Maybe it was a bit presumptuous of her, but in her mind people who told her no were only people who hadn't been convinced that they should say yes yet. Of course there was no way it could play out exactly like she'd stated it, but he was a smart boy and if he ever agreed to it he'd make it happen. Grey just looked up from his book, looking startled to see her in the library at all.

"**You're the girl who was with Macnair at Slughorn's party."** It was a statement of fact, not a question. Caroline nodded in agreement, pausing a moment before speaking again.

"**I am, but most people just call me Carrie."**

"**Right. Sorry. Nice to meet you, Carrie. I'm Grey."**

**"I already know who you are."**

"**... All right. Did you want something?"**

The smallest of smirks crossed Caroline's face as she gave him a once-over. He definitely looked as good as she remembered, and she was pleased that it hadn't just been the alcohol talking at Slughorn's party. **"Of course I do. D'you think I'd be here if I didn't?"**

**"No, I suppose not."  
**

"**I want **_**you**_**."**

The confusion on his face was so genuine that for a moment Caroline almost felt bad for putting him on the spot this way. When he finally spoke, his question just confused her more.

**"Me? Why?"**

**"... Why? Now, that's a silly question, Grey. Never ask a girl ****_why_**** she wants you. I just do, isn't that enough?"**

**"You haven't been drinking, have you? It's a bit early in the day for that."**

For a brief moment, Carrie had the decency to look sheepish. **"Not ****_much_****. I hardly had more than a sip, really. Trust me, if I wasn't sober you'd know it. I'd be much more direct. So, what do you say? Are you in or are you out?"**

Without skipping a beat, Grey shook his head. **"I'm flattered, Carrie, but I'm going to have to say no thanks."** It bothered Carrie more than she could say that he'd refused her without even taking a moment to think it over. Was she losing her touch? Usually the blunt, straightforward approach worked, but Grey wasn't having it. Those were the dreaded words, the ones she hadn't wanted to hear. At least he was polite about it, she supposed, but he wasn't telling her what she wanted to hear. She reached out, snatching the book from his hands as he was about to go back to it. Maybe it was rude to snatch things from people, but she'd never cared about that before and she wasn't done with him yet.

**"Why not, Grey? Give me one good reason you shouldn't do this."** She very much doubted that he would be able to do that, because … really, in the end, everybody wanted the same thing, didn't they? She didn't know why this boy thought he was any different and why he was trying to hard to hold out. In the end, people were mostly biologically programmed the same way. Grey lunged forward, getting halfway out of his chair before settling back down and running a hand through his hair.

**"Does it matter?"** he asked, raising an eyebrow at her before shrugging and leaning back in his chair. **"It's just not my thing."**

Carrie wasn't satisfied with that answer and continued to hold the book out of reach. **"Sure, it matters. You don't have a real reason, do you? I mean, come on – 'it's not my thing' really doesn't count."**

******"It's a real reason, Carrie."** The words were accompanied by a roll of his eyes. ******"It's not my thing, I don't do that, I don't really want to. I don't know how many other ways to say it."** Grey shrugged, before getting up out of his seat and skirting around her to head toward the bookshelves. At the end of the day, this would be a matter of endurance and strength of will. Who was stronger, Grey or Carrie? She liked to think that it was her, because … _really_, nobody had ever stood up to her before. Not like this. She didn't take no for an answer, not unless there was absolutely no alternative. And so, she dug in her heels, heading after him as he moved off toward the bookshelves.

Oh, the things she could _do_ to him, up against those bookshelves. She crossed her arms, leaning against the shelf next to him while he searched for another book. **"Come on, Abbott. I've got to have _something_ that you want."** Even if it was something simple and not at _all_ related to what _she_ wanted, it would at least give her a way in and give her time to work on him. He placed the book he was holding back on the shelf slowly, half-turning toward her.

**"Do you have the time? I think I may have skipped lunch." **There was a long pause as Carrie just stared at him, unable to determine if he was being completely serious. **"Oh, wait. I have a watch in my bag."** He placed the book back in its spot on the shelf and moved to walk past her again. **"Excuse me, Carrie." **He didn't so much as brush up against her, and she was left to trail after him again.

**"The time? Are you _serious_? I'm making you an offer you could take advantage of, and you want to know if I have the _time_."** She rolled her eyes as she followed him back toward the table he'd been sitting at earlier. He'd bent to retrieve said watch from his bag, and she was sure he was only half paying attention to her to begin with. **"That's sad, Grey."**

**"Maybe, but I suppose you'll have to get used to it."** He shrugged as he pulled a pocketwatch out of his bag and straightened. **"I _did_ miss lunch. I should probably go get some food,"**he murmured, sticking the watch in his pocket. Only then did his attention return to Caroline.

**"You're so ... frustrating."** Caroline hated letting people see that they were getting to her, but she figured that he probably already knew that, anyway. She watched as he shoved the remainder of his books and papers into his bag, resisting the urge to tap her foot with impatience.

**"Are you hungry?"**

Caroline shrugged. Truthfully, she'd skipped lunch, too. **"Not really, but I could use the opportunity to hound you some more."**Because this was _not_ over, she promised herself. She'd break down his defences if it was the last thing she did. **"Let's go." **She supposed that this battle would have to be written in the books as a tie - neither of them had really made much headway in getting the other to change their mind. She'd get him yet, though, she thought as they headed toward the exit.


	4. You'll Go Down In History

**Author's Note: **Thank you to owlgirlie387 for the review! It was much appreciated. I hope the journey will be an interesting one, to say the least. 3 And thanks for reading to everybody who has so far.

* * *

The layout of Hogwarts would always be a mystery to Caroline, it seemed, with its little intricacies and unexpected findings. If there was anything she'd managed to realize over the past few months, it was that by the end of her first (and only) year here she wouldn't even discover the tip of the iceberg. Having to tickle a painting of a pear to enter the kitchen, after all, wasn't something that she would have expected. It was just another amusing feature of a school that was so full of little quirks that she sometimes wondered how the students dealt with it. Her own school, prior to being shipped off, had been relatively quiet and tame in comparison.

No wonder they'd wanted her gone. Hogwarts, while being far more stuffy in many ways, actually seemed more welcoming to her than the school she'd attended for six years. Perhaps that was because none of the people here had known her quite long enough to be sick of the drama that came along with her yet. They'd find out soon enough just how chaotic life with her around could be, and she had no doubt that by the end of the year most of them would be glad to be rid of her.

Grey would likely be one of the ones who was, if things worked out the way she hoped they would. She doubted he was the type to give in lightly, after all. She watched him pull open the door to the kitchen, gesturing for her to go in before him. **"Ladies first."**

Well, there was a first time for everything. Carrie couldn't remember the last time anybody had even called her a lady, let alone treated her like one. She supposed that she didn't do herself any favours when it came to that, but still, the unusual treatment was nice. She brushed past him and into the kitchens, glancing around and taking a moment to process the sight of so many house elves bustling about. So, _this_ was how the magic happened. She nearly jumped as she was approached by one, asking if she'd like anything or if they could do anything for her. House elves, to be honest, had always made her feel a little uncomfortable. Most seemed so eager to serve, and that was _unnatural_, if you asked Carrie. Nobody should be happy about being in their position.

**"I'll just have some of whatever's left from lunch." **She knew there would be something, after all. The sheer volume of food produced meant that it rarely all got eaten at any given meal, and she supposed that the remainder was left over for students daring enough to sneak into the kitchens. She doubted they were _supposed_ to be here, after all, but ... why not? They weren't hurting anybody.

**"I'll have the same. Thanks,**" Caroline couldn't understand why Grey felt the need to thank them. They were only doing their job, after all, and they seemed so very eager to do it that it didn't seem necessary to her. Perhaps that mentality was simply an indication of the world she'd come from and the privileged life she'd led up to this point. One did not need to _thank_ the servants, after all - they were already adequately compensated for their time and hard work. She didn't think saying that would earn her any points with Grey, however, and so for the time being she remained silent.

They took a seat at a small table off to one side, out of the way so that they wouldn't distract the busy house-elves from their business. Now, Caroline thought, would be the perfect time to grill Grey. She needed to get inside his head. She needed to find out what made him _tick_, and why he didn't have the same reaction to her as most boys. Perhaps he didn't like the blonde hair, or the excessive makeup, or her clothing choices. She supposed she couldn't blame him for the last - most of her clothes were too tight for their own good and adorned with some form of sequin or glitter or embellishment. If that was the case, then this little gulf between them should be easy enough to cross.

If it was something more than that, however, she'd have to think long and hard about just why she felt so compelled to chase this boy. What made him so special, after all? She'd never been interested in a boy this completely and utterly _boring_, after all, and yet she was still here with him. That had to count for something, didn't it? She'd been about to open her mouth to ask him about what he liked when he beat her to the punch.

**"So ... what do you do, exactly, when you're not partying?"** Apparently her reputation preceded her here, too. She should have known that, even as sheltered as he was, he'd have heard of some of her hijinks. She didn't dare to hope that he'd actually asked about her, though. Even Carrie, as arrogant and cocky as she could be from time to time, wasn't quite willing to jump to that conclusion. As the food they'd asked for was delivered to them, Carrie began to eat absent-mindedly while trying to figure out what she should tell him. What did she like to do? That was a relatively short list in comparison to the things she didn't like to do. Then again, she'd try just about anything once, and she didn't like being bored.

**"I'm a member of the duelling club," **she finally told him, between bites of food. She supposed that that was as good a place as any to start, and hoped that that would be something that they had in common. He merely looked contemplative for a moment as he ate his own lunch.

**"Really? You don't seem like the type."**

She wasn't sure whether she should be offended by that assessment of her or not. **"Why's that? Because I'm a _girl_? Because I'm smaller than you?" **She reached out to run her hand over his arm lightly. **"Trust me, Grey. All the muscle in the world wouldn't save you if somebody were to get one lucky hex in."**

He shook his head, shifting his arm away and taking another bite of his lunch. **"No, it's not that. You just don't seem like that's something you'd be interested in. You're not exactly the serious type."**

Maybe that was a fair assessment when it came to most things, but Carrie believed the ability to duel was extremely important. One never knew what the world was going to throw at them, after all, and she'd heard enough whispers to know that there was a storm brewing on the horizon. She had the advantage of being pureblood and a Slytherin, and if her assumptions were correct, Grey had neither. She continued to eat her lunch in silence for a moment, before she gave him a response.

**"Maybe not about most things, but that's different. Think about the world we live in, Grey. Think about the sorts of _people_ that are out there."** She paused for a moment, wondering whether it was simply a lack of knowledge on his part talking. **"You do know how to duel, don't you?"**

**"Not exactly. It never seemed important."**

So, he _didn't_ know. That could be dangerous for him, really, and Carrie tended to rectify that. After all, perhaps if she helped _him_ out, then he'd help _her _out. That was a fair trade, after all, and both parties got something that they wanted. She wouldn't suggest that arrangement at the moment, however. She'd wait until after Christmas, at least.

**"I could teach you, if you like."**

**"I don't see why it's so important. I don't exactly have any enemies at the moment."**

**"Have you met half of my housemates? They'd attack you in a moment if they ever thought you forgot your place."**

Caroline didn't think Grey grasped the seriousness of the situation, but there was really nothing that she could do about that.

**"I don't intend to give them a reason."**

**"Nobody ever does. Some of them would attack you just for _not_ being pureblood."**

**"I'm not so sure they would."**

After taking the last few bites of her lunch, Caroline pushed her seat back and got up from the table. **"You may not be so sure, but I am. I've known them less than a year, and I know that. If you'd like to learn, I'll be in the north tower after dinner tomorrow." **With that she was on her way toward the exit, aiming a curt nod toward the house elves as she went. It was in his hands, now. If he wanted to show up, he would. And if he didn't? Well, then she'd know, and she'd just get drunk with Tessy and make her own fun. It wasn't like much would _change_.


	5. There's Always A Choice

**Author's Note:** Trying something new this time. I agree that Grey hasn't really been explored much at this point because I've been more in Carrie's head to this point, so this chapter's from his POV. :)

* * *

This was insanity. Grey knew that showing up and expecting something other than Carrie throwing herself at him again was a stupid move, but in the end he was curious enough about her and what she could possibly teach him that here he was, winding his way up the stairs to the North Tower after dinner. He supposed that the worst she could do was prove him right, so what did he have to lose? It wasn't as though he hadn't dealt with girls like her before. Some of them just didn't know how to take _no_ for an answer, and assumed that they could make him change his mind of they were persistent enough.

None of them went quite this far, though. It made him wonder if, just maybe, there was something more to Carrie than the partying and the alcohol and the blonde hair. She'd made it to seventh year, after all, which meant she had to have passed at least some of her OWLs. Or ...whatever it was that they took where _she_ was from. Grey had passed all of his, with flying colours no less. Nobody had been very surprised, given the amount of time he spent in the library. People had grown so used to seeing him with his nose buried in one book or another that they sometimes thought it strange when he wasn't hiding behind one.

He couldn't remember the last time anybody but his parents had actually tried quite so hard to push him out of his comfort zone. Maybe if he did this, let her teach him how to duel, she'd realize that he wasn't interested in anything _else_ and go on her way. It wasn't that he wasn't intrigued by her offer, because he _was_. He just didn't like complicated things, and when relationships were involved things were always complicated and messy. It was his choice not to indulge in meaningless flings and drunken one night stands. Most people might have said that it was only natural and that there was no such thing as 'choice' in the matter for a teenage boy, but there was _always_ a choice. He didn't want all the drama and aggravation that was involved, and so he stayed away.

He'd been tempted once or twice, but there was a different between wanting something and just jumping in and ignoring any possible consequences. The prior was natural, the latter reckless and stupid. Grey wasn't reckless, and he certainly wasn't stupid. And yet, here he was, indulging in this sort of behaviour just because he was intrigued by a girl who likely couldn't care less about him.

He knew all about her, after all - how she operated, how she'd already gone through half of his schoolmates. As much time as he spent in the library, he still wasn't totally out of the loop. He'd already been questioned by one of his friends about what she'd wanted from him and what he intended to do about it. His answer had, of course, been that he didn't intend to do _anything_ about it. He wasn't going to change just because she wanted something from him.

When he reached the top of the stairs, he paused for a brief scan of the tower. It only took him a moment to spot her, off to one side looking out one of the windows. Well, this was ... unexpected. He'd thought that she'd probably have had second thoughts by now and either left early or not shown up at all. Now they were both here, and he was completely unprepared for whatever was about to happen. She turned to look at him as he stepped into the room.

**"I was starting to think you weren't going to show."**

**"You did say you'd be here. It would have been rude not to."**

Something was different about her, Grey thought, studying her more closely in an effort to figure out what. Her hair was pulled back, but that wasn't really _much_ of a difference. It took him a moment to realize that a lot of other, little things were different too. Her clothes were much plainer than those he was used to seeing her wearing, and she didn't seem to have put quite as excessive an amount of makeup as usual. It was ... _different_, being able to see what she actually looked like.

**"... Do I have something on my face?"** Carrie self-consciously brought a hand up to her face, frowning at him. He hadn't even realized that he'd been looking for a little too long, and quickly shook his head.

**"No. You just look ... different."**

**"Good different or bad different?"**

**"I'm not sure. Just _different."_**

He wasn't sure whether she was satisfied with his answer or not, but she accepted it easily enough and gestured for him to move farther into the room. When he did, she moved in closer, circling around him slowly.

**"Have you ever duelled before?"**

She watched him as he shook his head, and a frown etched itself across her features. She didn't seem at all pleased with him not knowing how to defend himself, but he couldn't be certain why she'd _care_. She was pureblood, after all - she was one of the so-called elite. Why was she taking the time to teach him something that could save his life down the road? A little voice in the back of his mind told him that it was because she cared, but that was ridiculous. Caroline Winters didn't get attached to boys. She got what she wanted from them and left them behind, and he needed to keep that in mind. As sincere as she might seem, people didn't change. Not that quickly, anyway, he knew that

**"I've never really needed to, and I don't exactly plan on getting myself into trouble."**

**"Nobody ever _plans _on it."**

Why did she seem so concerned about this? They both knew that the world was a dangerous place, after all, but if you kept your head down and didn't purposely cause trouble things generally went well enough. He'd learned that from personal experience - he'd minded his own business, and people had left him alone. Carrie, on the other hand, seemed to think that it was only a matter of time.

**"Until what?"**

She paused for a moment in her circling at that question, shrugging her shoulders in answer. **"Until all hell breaks loose and nobody's safe anymore, I guess. You can't tell me you don't _feel_ the tension these days."** He wouldn't deny that. It was always there, and some days it was so thick that you could practically cut it with a knife.

**"Everybody feels it."**

**"All the more reason to learn to defend yourself. Come on, get your wand out."**

Grey obeyed the command, retrieving his wand from the pocket of his robes. **"Now what?"**

**"Let's see how you hold it." **He held it up, holding it lightly. She examined his hand for a moment, before stepping away. **"You might want to hold on a little tighter. If you drop it, you're as good as dead."**

He tightened his grip on the wand slightly and watched her step a little farther away. **"It's not like I'm in any real danger right now."**

**"Maybe not, but some day you might be." **He still didn't understand why she was so adamant about that. He was about to open his mouth to ask her why exactly she thought he'd end up in trouble when she spoke again. **"Alright, let's get this started. If we start now we can get in a few hours."**

They spent the next three hours tossing hexes and jinxes at each other. Grey ended up getting hit with more than his fair share, though he managed to land a few good ones, too. Maybe he wasn't exactly well-practised in the art of duelling, but he wasn't hopeless, either. When they were finally done, Grey leaned against the wall for a moment to recover. Caroline didn't do the same, instead stopping to pat him on the shoulder before she left.

**"Same time tomorrow?"**

She was going to be the death of him, he realized, but he nodded in agreement anyway. **"Yeah. Same time tomorrow."**


	6. Tangled Up In You

**Author's Note: **Thank you again for the review! From this point on I'm going to try to have it be more balanced, with each of the main characters getting focus chapters, etc. This one's back to Carrie again. 3

* * *

Caroline was starting to think that if Tessy heard her talk about Grey _one more time_, the other girl might start tearing her own hair out. Even she knew that the babbling about the boy had to be irritating, but she couldn't quite help herself. They'd been having duelling practices together for the past few days, and she'd have been lying if she'd tried to claim that what she'd seen hadn't impressed her. Grey was a quick learner, and she could at least rest assured that now if he was ever attacked he wouldn't be likely to drop his wand because he wasn't holding on tight enough, or anything equally ridiculous. Now that she and Tessy were alone together, hidden away in a dark corner of the astronomy tower, Carrie didn't feel quite so bad for talking about him.

Part of her wasn't sure why she was so interested in him to begin with. Somehow it went _beyond_ just thinking he was attractive and wanting to get him into bed and then leave him, but she wasn't about to go as far as to admit that. It was a miracle that she could even admit that to herself, really. She had had an aversion to anything remotely resembling love or genuine affection for the past few years, with good reason. The last boy she'd let herself get attached to had proven to be a complete waste of her time, so why take the chance of that happening again?

This was different, though. She wasn't sure how or why, but it was. Perhaps that was only her current state of intoxication speaking, but she wanted to believe that just maybe Grey could see her for who she was and not hate her for it. Tessy could, after all, and that was something relatively new in Carrie's world.

**"Tessy, you don't understand. He's just so _pretty_."**

**"Carrie, there were _plenty_ boys at the party who were just as pretty, but I don't hear you babbling about them."**

That statement made Caroline pause for a second, frowning as she considered Tessy's words. Maybe that was true, but she didn't _know _those boys. She could talk about their looks all she wanted, but none of them wanted to _talk_ to her or get to know her the way Grey had been doing over the past few days. She sighed, shaking her head. **"I don't _know_ them. It's not like I'd have much to talk about."**

**"Just admit it, Carrie. You _like_ him."**

What? No, absolutely not. Carrie thought he was attractive and definitely wanted to get to know him a little more _ intimately_, but she wasn't going to admit to Tessy that there was even the possibility of like Grey Abbott. Everybody had told her that he'd be unattainable, after all, but she was working on it. Maybe she'd admit it when she had him right where she wanted him, but for now she _didn't_.

**"No! No way. That's completely ridiculous. I don't _do_ feelings, you know that."**

Tessy only looked amused, shaking her head at Carrie's denial. Caroline, thinking that it was high time for a subject change, retrieved two small vials of bright green potion from her pocket. She held one out to Tessy. **"Here, try some." **She waited until the other girl took the vial before uncorking her own and downing it in one swig. Tessy followed suit, while Caroline turned to look out over the school grounds. She didn't know why more people didn't venture up into the astronomy tower on the weekends, long after darkness fell. Sure, it was out of bounds and against the rules, but when had that ever stopped her?

**"It tastes funny,"** Tessy commented, making a face. Caroline shrugged, digging her fingertips into the rough stone of the castle wall. Maybe, but it got the job done. It made all the bad, confusing feelings go away and just made everything nice and fuzzy and _happy_, and she could live with having a little more of than in her life. Carrie honestly couldn't remember the last time she'd been really happy without the aid of alcohol or something stronger. Was that a terrible thing for a seventeen-year-old to claim? Maybe, but that didn't make it any less true.

**"It's nice, though, isn't it?"**

**"Yeah, it is."**

Carrie fell silent for a moment, watching the stars as they seemed to start shifting and moving before her very eyes. Almost like _dancing_, really, if you thought about it. She wondered if Grey knew how to dance. He probably didn't, as much time as he spent in the library and _away_ from any situation that would require him to dance._  
_

**"I didn't know stars could dance ..."**

**"They can't, Carrie. Does look like it, though, doesn't it?"**

**"I wonder if Grey can dance."**

Tessy let out an exasperated sigh, and Carrie idly reached out to push a strand of hair back out of the other girl's face. Was it really such a bad thing, to be focused on one person like this? Probably. Maybe Tessy was right, and she was going soft. She didn't like that idea, not one bit. Maybe she should say so, she thought, just as Tessy started to speak.

**"I don't care _what_ you say - you do like him."**

**"No, I don't. I just think he's attractive. You should _see_ him after he gets all hot and sweaty at duelling practice ..."**

Tessy suddenly seemed a little more interested, turning her attention toward her friend. **"Alright, _now _I'm listening. Tell me more."**

**"Practice can get very ... intense. It's only natural to get a little overheated."**

**"Not about _practice_, Carrie. About the _boy_."**

Carrie frowned, moving an unfocused gaze toward Tessy. Why was she suddenly so interested? It was only feeding into the harebrained idea that Carrie had in her head that Tessy wanted Grey, too. Didn't Tessy get that if Carrie succeeded, then other girls might actually have a chance with him? After all, if he could do it once, there was no doubt that he could manage repeat performances.

**"No. You don't get to see him that way for a _reason_."**

**"Oh, come on. Don't be selfish."**

**"I'm not being _selfish_. It's just personal, that's all."**

**"Oh, come on. Tell me, what was it like?"**

Carrie sighed. In the end, it was best to just give in and tell Tessy what she wanted to know, or she'd never let it go. **"You've seen him, Tessy. He looks about like you'd expect. You know, good. Amazing, even."**

**"Any progress at all?"**

**"No. I don't think he sees me that way. He'll probably be happy to be rid of me when we're done our lessons."**

**"That's too bad."**

**"I just want him to like me, Tessy."** That was a big admission for Carrie to make, and if it hadn't been for the hold of the alcohol and other substances over her, she might have put it off longer. It didn't seem like such a big deal, however, with just her and Tessy and the darkness to witness it. Tessy wrapped an arm around her shoulders and squeezed gently.

**"I know. I'm sorry."**

It wasn't Tessy's fault, of course, but the arm around her shoulders and the soothing words made her feel better just the same.


	7. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

**Author's Note: **Another chapter from Grey's perspective. It's probably going to be pretty even this point, with rounds of a chapter for each of them.

* * *

Grey had decided to spend the Christmas break at Hogwarts, and he had to admit that he was enjoying the quiet. It was Christmas Eve and there wasn't a soul in the library. Madame Pince seemed to have left without kicking him out. Perhaps she was feeling the holiday cheer? Grey had brought in a tray of cookies earlier that day that he'd baked himself, after all. Then again, Madam Pince pretty much left him to his own devices because she'd come to know him well enough that he treated the books like they were his own children. Then again, he'd never had children. He liked to _think_ he'd treat them even better than he did the books, but it wasn't likely that he'd find out any time soon.

That was just as well, really. He had enough on his hands with Caroline. He'd thought that once she'd realized that he wasn't going to give her what she wanted, she'd have been gone again. To his surprise, however, she kept coming _back_. He'd saved a few of the Christmas cookies for her, just in case. She'd already refused to eat things he'd baked a couple times, something to do with not wanting to gain weight, but eventually if she kept spending time with him she'd probably give in and try something. He didn't see what she was so worried about, anyway - a few cookies were hardly going to be the end of her.

It was getting late, Grey realized. Usually Carrie would have been here by now, giggling and telling him all about her night and exactly what she'd been up to. Half of it he didn't even _want_ to know, but she told him anyway. He supposed that at the very least she was honest with him. That counted for something, didn't it? He liked to think that he was getting to know her better than most people. He wanted to believe that he was getting to see the _real_ Carrie. He'd come to expect her to show up, no matter how late it got. Or was it how _early_ it got, by this point? It was quickly creeping up on midnight. He'd been keeping track, though he was trying hard not to watch the clock. He'd actually started to enjoy her company, when she wasn't babbling about getting into bed with him.

Usually she'd give up after asking him the first time, now. It was always the first question she asked when she showed up at the library, and once it was out of the way they could get around to more important things. He glanced up from his book again, before deciding to completely stop watching the clock. Maybe she'd found somebody more suitable to occupy her time, finally. Maybe she'd accepted that she was never going to get what she wanted from him and _moved on_. That was for the best, wasn't it?

That didn't explain why the idea bothered him so much. This was exactly the sort of complicated mess he _hadn't_ wanted to get himself tangled up in. He found himself missing the days when it had been just himself and his books. He turned the page with a sigh, nearly jumping out of his seat when he felt a gentle pressure placed on his shoulders. He glanced back over his shoulder only to see the girl who'd been the subject of his thoughts for the past few hours, smiling at him as though he might actually be the most important person in the world.

It was an illusion, of course, but a nice one to indulge for a few seconds. He returned the smile before turning his attention back to his book, letting her continue on with whatever it was she was up to. The pressure on his shoulders increased slightly as she rubbed them, apparently intent on working out whatever kinks and knots she thought might be there.

**"You're always so tense,"** Grey heard her mumble under her breath. That was probably true. He'd always been a little too hard-working for his own good, according to other people, and he didn't doubt that it took its toll. He sighed and leaned his head forward a little.

**"I know, but that's not about to change." **She might be able to keep him relaxed for a while, but eventually he'd get tense again over all the things he needed to do and over the impending NEWTs. It was a lot to rest on the shoulders of a teenage boy, but he managed to tackle it all well enough for the most part. She didn't answer, instead working on his shoulder until she was satisfied that he wasn't quite as tense anymore**. **Once that was done she moved to take the empty seat at the table next to him, leaning forward to rest her head on the table. She spoke once more before her eyes closed.

**"Merry Christmas, love."**

Grey wasn't sure he could have heard what he thought he did, but in the end, what did it really mean? Sure, _love_ wasn't a word that somebody like Carrie threw around, but she wasn't sober and she probably loved everybody right now. He wasn't going to read too much into it. He was a smart boy, after all, and he knew as well as anybody that Carrie wasn't the settling-down type. He waited a moment as her breathing evened out, before taking his robe from the back of his chair and folding it. He gently lifted her head, carefully placing the robe underneath.

**"Merry Christmas, Carrie."** He brushed a strand of blonde hair back out of her face and before returning to his book. He didn't think he'd ever seen her look this peaceful before, to be honest. He found his spot on the page, able to focus now that he was no longer compelled to glance at the clock every now and then.


	8. Better Get Your Story Straight

**Author's Note: **Thanks again to owlgirlie387 for the reviews! I hope you like how this is turning out so far! This chapter is a Carrie one, and of course the next one will be a Grey chapter.

* * *

What had Carrie been _thinking_ the night before? She could vaguely remembered mumbling something vaguely resembling the word 'love' to Grey, though she doubted he'd even heard it. She was still irritated by the fact that her drunken mind would betray her that way. She did _not_ love Grey Abbott, she reminded herself. Half the time, she wasn't even sure if she _liked_ him. He stubbornly refused to give in, and Carrie didn't know how much longer she could take this game of cat-and-mouse. She was starting to lose sight of the end goal, which was to sleep with him and then leave him in the dust. That was how she operated, and that was how it had to stay. If she lost sight of that, she might actually find herself falling for him, and that was _unacceptable._

How _dare_ he make her feel anything? She hadn't felt anything like this for a boy for a few years now, and the idea that he might be able to dredge up those old emotions wasn't one that she liked at all. Still, she _did_ still have a goal to reach, and so she'd keep right on playing the game. Eventually, one of them would lose. Either Grey would give in, or Carrie would admit defeat.

She didn't like his chances.

She'd spent the previous few days going through her family's contacts, trying to procure what she thought would be the _perfect_ Christmas present for Grey. They'd only arrived very early that morning, with a couple very put-upon owls delivering them and one nearly taking off her finger while she was trying to detach the package from its leg.

Still, it was going to be worth it, she told herself. It would be worth it to see the look on his face. She hoped this would earn her some points in his eyes, so that he might start to _consider_ her proposition. At this point, she'd take whatever she could get from him. A kiss, a few less-than-innocent touches, a chance to get _closer_ to him. She wasn't supposed to be thinking this way, she knew, but Grey intrigued her and she was having trouble getting him off her mind. If her mother had any idea that she'd busied herself with chasing a halfblood boy, no doubt the Winters matriarch would have demanded that she return home for the holidays at once.

Caroline's mother expected her orders to be followed to the letter, after all, no matter how outlandish and ridiculous they might be. She'd been trying to convince friends of the family to consider her as a match for their sons for years, but nobody was quite willing to go there. They knew Carrie's history, after all, and that she was considerably less than _pristine_. She was not what they wanted for their sons and heirs, and Mrs. Winters would not consider wedding her daughter to a second son. Honestly, Carrie didn't know why her mother hadn't just written her off yet.

She had Megaera, after all. Perfect, pretty, _proper_ Meg was going to accomplish everything that Caroline never had and was going to live the perfect life. Carrie wasn't cut out for that. She was flawed and broken and a _mess_ in general, and that was all she'd ever be. She doubted very much that people took her seriously. She was good for a bit of fun, sure, but when it came time to settle down nobody was ever going to come looking for her.

Which was fine, really. She wasn't that type of girl. A life of domestic bliss really wasn't in the cards for her, she was certain. Perhaps she'd go on to do great things with her life, but inevitably she'd do them _alone_. Grey was another conquest, just like the rest. There were certain things she would give him, but her heart wouldn't be one of those things. She knew, however, that in order to make him agree to her plan she'd probably need him to _think_ she had.

Was she willing to lie to him that way? She couldn't be sure. She knew that if she did play him that way, it would burn any and every bridge that had ever existed between them. Could she do that? Did she _want _to?

She shook that off as she finished wrapping Grey's christmas present. She'd cross that bridge when she came to it. She stowed the wrapped package into her bag and headed off for the library. That was where he'd be, after all, even on _Christmas_.

He didn't disappoint. He was sitting right there, at his usual table with his usual stack of books on the table. She quietly approached and slipped into the empty seat next to him. She didn't remember how late she'd been at the library the night before, but thankfully she was alone in her dormitory and there had been nobody to wake up. She gave him the most chipper smile she could manage and set her bag down on the table.

"**Merry Christmas, Grey."** She carefully pulled the package from her bag, setting it down on the table and pushing it slightly toward him. **"I got you something."**

She honestly hadn't expected him to have done the same. He stared at the package for a moment, as though he expected it to grow legs. **"... You did?"** He seemed almost surprised, and Carrie had to wonder what people really thought about her. Did they really think that she was always _completely _selfish and bitchy? Maybe she was, most of the time, but she had her moments.

"**Of course I did. Go on, open it."**

"**All right, all right."** He reached out for the package, turning it over in his hands and examining it before unwrapping it. Once he was done he examined the books that she'd gotten for him. **"... Wow." **She wondered if her intuition had been wrong and if Grey hated them, for a moment. The look on his face was hard to read, and she frowned.

"**What?"**

"**Nothing. Just ... wow."**

"**Do you hate them?"**

"**No, of course not. I love them. I just ... never thought I'd ****_own_**** them."**

Carrie breathed a sigh of relief as she watched him run his fingers over them with a sort of reverence. He definitely didn't _hate_ them, then. She'd pulled considerable strings to get her hands on them, but she liked to think that in the end it would be worth it. Her mother would ask questions about where the money had gone, of course. No doubt one would be able to knock her over with a feather when Carrie told her that it had been spent on _books_.

"**Well, now you do."**

"**Yeah, I do. Thanks."**

**"So, how about it?"**

Grey just chuckled and shook his head. **"No thanks, Carrie."**

Carrie sighed, leaning against the table slightly. **"Oh, come ****_on_****. It's Christmas. Don't I at least get a kiss?" **She hoped that, some day, he'd stop turning her down and actually give her what she wanted. He just shook his head.

**"How about a present instead?"** He bent and rummaged in his bag a moment to retrieve a wrapped Christmas present, placing it on the table and sliding it toward her.

**"For me?"** She hadn't expected him to have gotten her one. She'd only gotten him one because she wanted something from him, after all - or so she told herself. What he hoped to get out of this was completely lost on her.

**"No. For the person sitting next to you."**

**"Very funny, Grey."** She pulled it in closer and examined it a moment. **"What is it?"**

**"Open it and find out."**

Carrie eyed the package suspiciously. She didn't like surprises, and she'd prefer to know what it was so that she had time to process the knowledge before the real thing was staring her in the face. **"I don't like surprises."**

**"It's nothing bad."**

**"Fine."** She hesitated briefly before tearing the wrapping paper off with all the zeal of a six-year-old on Christmas morning. It was a set of three books, two of defensive magic and one that looked suspiciously as though it had nothing to do with magic at all and might even be a _muggle_ book. **"Oh. It's ... books."**

**"So you could have something to read while I study." **Grey was silent as he studied her face, frowning. **"You hate them, don't you?"**

She felt the need to tell him that she didn't hate them. The books were _useful_, no doubt, but books had never really been her style. **"I don't hate them. They're just ... not really my style."**

**"Just thought you might want something to read while I'm studying." **Grey shrugged and went back to looking over his own Christmas present. Carrie frowned and looked more closely at the books. Maybe she could turn over a new leaf? He had been nice enough to get them for her, after all.

**"Can I have the kiss, too?"  
**

Grey shook his head. **"No."**

**"Please?"  
**

**"No."  
**

She sighed and picked up the top book, opening it. **"Fine."** It was going to be a long day, but she supposed at least she'd have something to occupy her.


	9. The Wolves Outside The Walls

**Author's Note: **Another Grey chapter. =] Sorry it's a bit short, but with the way the chapter ended there's not a whole lot more that could have been done with it. Hope you like it!

* * *

Grey had never seen Carrie this jumpy. They'd been sitting in the library like usual, him studying and her pretending to read while she watched him, but there was something _different_ about this. Maybe it had something to do with the blinding snow outside, and the way the wind howled around the castle walls? She wouldn't be the first one to feel a little nervous and skittish because of the weather. Grey really didn't let it bother him, but he knew that it did some people. The way he saw it, they were in one of the safest places they could be, surrounded by centuries-old stone walls. After sitting through nearly an hour of her fidgeting in her seat, he finally looked up from his book.

"**Carrie, what's wrong?"**

Now that he took a closer look at her, he could see the obvious signs of discomfort about her. She looked tense, and a slight tremor ran through her every time the wind howled. This might be worse than he'd thought. She just shook her head, gesturing at the window.

"**The wind – I don't like it when it howls like that. It sounds like a pack of wolves."**

Grey couldn't quite understand the fear. It was only the wind, after all – it wasn't like there was _actually_ a pack of wolves prowling outside the walls waiting to rip them apart. That sort of thing just didn't happen. It wasn't a full moon, either, so werewolves weren't exactly a worry. Grey liked to think that there weren't werewolves in these parts, anyway. He would have been wrong, of course, but there was no way for him to have known that. He just gave her what he hoped was a reassuring smile.

**"It's just the wind, Carrie. There's nothing to worry about."**

She didn't seem convinced. She frowned at the window, before turning back toward him. **"I don't like it, Grey. It sounds _angry_."**

He really wished that she's stop drinking before coming to visit him at the library. If she'd been completely sober at this point, he likely wouldn't have had to worry about her being so afraid. As it was, she was tipsy and more than a little irrational. She likely knew that there was nothing to fear, but feared it anyway.

**"It'll be alright. I promise. Nothing's going to hurt you while I'm right here." **Grey had grown rather fond of Carrie - or at least, accustomed to having her around. He enjoyed spending time with her, now that she seemed to have wrapped her head around the idea that he wasn't going to just fall into bed with her. She was brighter than most people gave her credit for, but underneath it all he suspected that she didn't believe in herself enough to put her brains to good use. She had a decent poker face, but the way she lived her life practically screamed that she was insecure and in desperate need of affection.

If he gave in now, though, she'd have no reason to stay. Part of him _wanted _to so very much, but he couldn't take that risk. If anything was ever going to happen between them, he was going to need some sort of reason to believe that she wasn't going to just disappear when it was all said and done. He turned his attention back to his book, only to be distracted moments later by the sound of her sliding her chair just a little closer to his. He stared at her for a second in silence, before she moved a little closer.

**"Did you need something?"**

It was a valid question. There had to be some reason she was moving in closer, after all, and he hoped that it wasn't because she was up to something. She'd been doing so well, after all - it had been hours since she'd propositioned him or tried to kiss him. She just glanced down at her book, then up at him.

**"Could you ... maybe ... "**

He waited for her to finish her sentence, but she never did. He gave her the gentle nudge she needed to finish the thought. **"Could I maybe _what_, Carrie?"**

**"Hold me for a secon****d? It might make me feel better."**

Was she being serious? He never thought he'd see the day when _Caroline Winters_, of all people, actually wanted somebody to hold her. He doubted that she was the romantic or cuddly type, after all. She probably wanted to get in, get what she wanted, and get back out. Which made him wonder - why was she still here, after all this time? She'd been chasing him over a week, after all, and that was unheard-of in her world. He thought about refusing her request, but what was the point? All she wanted was a little comfort, and he could give that. The tremors and the tension in her expression weren't something that she could have been faking, as far as he was concerned.

**"All right."**

A brief smile crossed her face as he held one arm out. She moved her chair in closer, leaning in to rest against his side and pressing resting her head against his shoulder. She felt so much _smaller_ than he'd expected. Caroline had a rather large presence, after all, and sometimes he forgot just how small she really was. It was a little intimidating - she felt as though she'd break if he didn't handle her with care.

**"Thanks, Grey,"** Carrie mumbled into his neck, fingers curling in the fabric of his sweater as she relaxed against him. He shifted his hand to stroke her hair, resting his cheek against the top of her head.

**"No problem."**

He went back to flipping through his book as best he could with his free hand, and eventually the tremors stopped and her breathing began to even out. Soon enough it was completely even, as she fell sleep leaned against his side. He paused to kiss her on the top of her head, knowing that she was fast asleep and wouldn't be able to use it against him later.

Maybe all these years he'd been wrong and there really _was_ a little bit of a romantic spirit in him after all.


	10. The Best Way To Start The Year

**Author's Note: **Sorry about the wait! I moved and was supposed to get internet the day after, but there was a mess up in their system and now - nine days later - I've finally got internet. It's been a long nine days, but now I'm back and hopefully here to stay.

* * *

**The Best Way To Start The Year**

Time was passing quickly. Too quickly, really, given the fact that in a few short months Carrie would be done with her schooling and shipped of back across the pond. Why did that idea bother her so much? Mere weeks ago she couldn't wait to be out of this boring place, and all she'd been able to think about were pretty boys and the excitement waiting for her back in New York City. Perhaps it wasn't the center of the world, but to Caroline it certainly _felt_ like it was. And why shouldn't it? It had so much more going for it than anything she'd seen here that she didn't feel at all bad about deeming it more important. She couldn't forget that, couldn't let anything drag her mind away from the fact that soon enough she'd be back home.

Something does, of course – or rather, someone. She never thought that she'd actually come to _like_ Grey Abbott, or even think about him as more than a pretty face attached to an attractive package. And yet, she'd been thinking about him more than she should. She hoped that when classes started again she'd have a reason to think about things other than Grey, but for now there was nothing to distract her or keep her mind occupied. Perhaps that was why she found herself winding her way to the library on New Years' Eve, conveniently before midnight.

She shouldn't have gone, and she knew it. She wasn't what he wanted, after all. He'd made that quite clear to her, time and time again. Still, she couldn't help showing up, wondering if he'd actually let her kiss him. It was the new year, after all – everybody got to kiss somebody at midnight, and she didn't see why Grey had to be any different. She couldn't think of anybody else that _she_ wanted to kiss, she thought as she made her way through the library doors and beelined for his usual table. She was a little tipsy, but of course he'd be used to this by now. She was tipsy more often than not, and that worked just fine for her. She'd managed to stay on her feet and keep her wits about her thus far, and that was really all that mattered.

When she spotted him with his customary stack of books, a smile brightened her face. What _was_ this? Had he cast some sort of spell on her? Slipped her a love potion, perhaps? No, that couldn't be. She didn't love him, she reminded herself, but she liked him enough to make her uncomfortable. She made her way around the table and settled into the seat next to him, giving him her best smile.

"**So, how about it? Tonights as good a night as any."** It was custom, now – she would ask him, he would refuse, and they would get on with things. He shook his head and brushed off the remark as though it was nothing, which still amazed Carrie just a little. He was the only boy who'd ever turned her down so easily. Most of them seemed to at least consider her offer, but Grey didn't even give her that much. She perched on her chair, ready for the moment her pocketwatch struck midnight as she watched him read. She pulled it out of the pocket of her robes, setting it on the table and watching it carefully. He glanced at her, one eyebrow raised.

"**I need to know when it's midnight,**" was her only explanation. He just shrugged, not seeming to immediately put the clues together. That worked just fine for Carrie, in the end. She wanted an honest reaction when she kissed him, and she wouldn't get that if he had time to prepare. As the second hands ticked away, approaching midnight, she pulled her chair in closer and leaned in slightly. He shifted his head to look at her, confused, only to finally appear to realize what she was up to.

Her lips brushed his – it wasn't aggressive, just a light pressure of her lips on his. It was more than she thought she'd ever get. He even kissed her back, for a moment, though he pulls away looking suspiciously pink.

"**Happy New Years'?"**

"**Happy New Year, Grey."**

And maybe it actually will be, this year. For Carrie, it had started off better than she'd expected. In fact, it was probably the best way to start the year that she could think of. She settled back into her seat, closing the pocket watch and slipping it back into the pocket of her robes. He watched her for a moment before returning to his book. She selected one from the stack in front of him, too, but that was mostly so that she could hide behind it and pretend to read. In reality, she just liked to watch _him_ read. She never thought that would be a thought that would ever cross his mind, but the look on his face when he was concentrating on something was so intense that sometimes she couldn't help but stare. That sort of thing was a foreign concept to her, and he'd actually caught her staring like some sort of idiot at one point.

After that, she'd started pretending to read. Better to have the cover of the book, so he wouldn't be so likely to notice. The last thing she needed was for him to think that this meant more than it did. She wasn't in this to become his best friend, and she certainly wasn't looking to fall in love with him. Which, in the end, was the reason the idea that she could was so scary. She thought she'd been completely closed off to that sort of thing, but apparently not.

They continued to read on in silence until Carrie fell asleep with her face buried in one of the books. Grey carefully extracted the book, replacing it with his folded-up robes. She woke the next morning alone in the library with Grey's folded robes, and a note saying that he'd gone for a morning run and that he'd be back soon. She stretched and tucked the note into her pocket, scribbling a quick note to him to meet her in the kitchens.

She was sure he'd be hungry when he got back, after all. She would have been, if she'd been the sort to go on early-morning runs. She retreated from the table, setting a path for the kitchens. She was going to have to get them to get something good. Maybe a few muffins, some eggs, whatever they could come up with at this hour. The house elves would know her by now - she'd come with Grey before, and they seemed to like him well enough. Sure enough, they came scurrying to her as soon as she walked in the door.

This was ... nice. She had to admit that she was starting to like this not-quite-relationship that she had with Grey. It felt oddly normal, given the fact that it wasn't something either of them did. That wasn't to say that she _wanted_ to settle down, but so far this didn't really feel like settling down. She didn't feel as though she'd had to give much up yet.

**"Breakfast, please. For Grey and I."**


End file.
